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[newspaper clipping]
TO THE  FRIENDS OF THE HAPPY PAID. 
  Since the world began, there probably never
was a marriage of which somebody did not  dis-
approve.   That somebody, and everybody, has
a perfect right to an opinion on such a subject,
nobody doubts.  But how far you prove your
greater love for  Tom,  by whispering round
 confidentially  your fore-ordained determina-
tion not to believe that  that woman  can ever
make him happy, is a question.  Poor fellow!
and she of all people in the world; the very
last woman you would have selected; which of
course is sure to get to Tom s wife s ears, and
produce a fine foundation for belief in the reali-
ty of your regard for him, and your good na-
ture generally.
  Now as there were seldom, or never, two
parties bound together in any relation of life,
whether as business partners, pastor and peo-
ple, teacher and pupil, master and subordinate,
mistress and maid, who always moved along
with perfect unanimity, it is hardly to be ex-
pected that the marriage of  Tom  and his
wife will effect a total revolution for the better
in human nature, any more than did your own
marriage.  Perhaps even Tom and his wife,
though loving each other very much, may have
a difference of opinion on some subject; but
what is that to you?  They don t need your
guardianship or supervision in the matter.  It
is very curious that those persons who clamor
most loudly when  Tom  marries without their
consent and approbation, are, ten to one, those
who have themselves married clandestinely,
or otherwise offended against the rigid rule
which they would apply in his particular case.
  Broad philanthropists!  Tom can surely be
happy in no way but theirs.  They love him so
much better than  that woman  possibly can.
Poor  Tom!   He looked so poorly last time
they saw him.  Her fault, of course.  They
knew it would be just so.  Didn t they say so
from the first?  Poor Tom! such a sacrifice.
It is unaccountable how he can like her.  For
the matter of that, they never will believe he
does, (and they might add, he sha n t if we can
help it.)  And so, when they see him, they in-
quire with a churchyard air,  Is he well? 
 Is anything the matter?    Ah, you needn t
tell us; we know how it is; poor Tom we
know you try to bear up under it.  Come and
see us.  We will love you.  You never will find
us changed. 
  No.  That s the worst of it!  No hope of
their changing.  Bless their souls.  How lucky
 Tom  has somebody to tell him what a  sac-
rifice he has made,  or he never would find it
out!  Well, it is astonishing that such people
don t see that this is the last way to convince
any person with common sense, that they are
better qualified to be installed guardians of
 Tom s  happiness than  that woman. 
				    FANNY FERN.
Page
Title:Thomas Butler Gunn Diaries, Volume Eleven: page eighty
Description:Newspaper clipping written by Fanny Fern for ''The New York Ledger,'' responding to a letter she found from Mary Rogers, criticizing her marriage with James Parton.
Subject:Fern, Fanny; Gunn, Thomas Butler; Marriage; New York ledger.; Parton, James; Parton, Mary (Rogers); Rogers, William; Women
Coverage (City/State):[New York, New York]
Scan Date:2011-01-31

 

Volume
Title:Thomas Butler Gunn Diaries, Volume Eleven
Description:Includes descriptions of boarding house living at 132 Bleecker Street, his freelance writing and drawing work, the antics of New York literary Bohemians, Fanny Fern and James Parton's marriage, visits to the Edwards family, a Fourth of July excursion with the Edwards family and other friends, letters from Frank Cahill and Bob Gun's mistresses, Jesse Haney's proposal of marriage to Sally Edwards and rejection, Charles Damoreau's return from Boston to live in New York, and attending the Edwards family's 1859 Christmas party.
Subject:Boardinghouses; Bohemians; Christmas; Gunn, Thomas Butler; Marriage; Publishers and publishing; Women
Coverage (City/State):New York, New York
Note:Thomas Butler Gunn was born February 15, 1826, in Banbury, England, and came to New York in 1849. During the Civil War he worked as a correspondent for the New York Tribune and the New York Evening Post. He returned to England in 1863, and died in Birmingham in April 1903. The collection includes twenty-one volumes of his diaries, including newspaper clippings, letters, photographs, sketches, and various other items inserted by Gunn. Diary entries date from July 7, 1849, to April 7, 1863, and include his experiences with the New York publishing and literary world, his descriptions of boarding houses, his travels throughout the United States, and his experiences traveling with the Federal army as a Civil War correspondent.
Publisher:Missouri History Museum
Rights:Copyright 2011 Missouri History Museum.
Source:Page images, transcriptions, and metadata of the Thomas Butler Gunn diaries have been provided by the Missouri History Museum.