Lehigh University
The Vault at PfaffsAn Archive of Art and Literature by the Bohemians of Antebellum New York
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Text for Page 099 [01-29-1859]

              87
does her duty to her husband, loves her boy, not
wisely, perhaps, and spite of her fiddle-playing and
tongue, is a kind-hearted woman.     Especially for this
country.          I have been, at odd snatches of time,
dressing, feeding, taking my one matin pipe &c going
through the �Scouring of the White Horse� by that trump
of an author of �Tom Brown.�  It has given me a yearning
for England � rustic England; and will doubtless affect
many banished fellows thus, all over the world.   The
dialect is akin to that of my native Oxfordshire � how
familiar and pleasant to me.   It touches me as Burn�s
localism must Scotchmen.     Oh that I could only live
in England! in dear, beautiful, stately, beneficent
old Oxford, most beautiful of cities in this world!   Why
was my lot cast in this d��____d demagogueocracy?  Well,
perhaps to do something after all, when I have learnt
my lesson.   Perhaps to show it up � who knows?  God
help me to tell truth and nothing but truth, if he
intends me to do it.   Perhaps I may never get the
chance.   What raw material have I amassed in these
diarizings!   All sorts of scruples beset me as to
doing this, whether it is�nt infernally wrong, unfair,
&c � but I must keep on.  It�s grown part of my
Nature.
  30.  Sunday.  Col. Forbes up, as I sat in Haney�s
room.  Forthwith he plunged into a description of the
modus operandi of gas-making in general and the one mode
destined to supersede them and make his fortune &.  As               
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