28
VAJSTITTT  FAIR
[JANUARY 7, 1860.
Ye   LASTE FLIPPE-FLAFPE   OF Ye  NOBLE EVERETTE.
E Bonner keeps a Historian.
The annals of the Ledger
will henceforward be
chronicled and emblazoned, and doubtless take
their place among the archives of the Republic,
along with; the Declaration of Independence anel
StephenH. Branch's confession. This is as it
should be. Great men,
from time immemorial,
have supported feudal retinues. Bonner has already had a Herald, and
and if the place of Jester
was vacant, we should
like to enter a proposal
for that jocular office.
We also could recommend a capital Trumpeter to the gallant Sir
Bonner, but we believe
that the knight in question plays upon that noble instrument himself.
We learn by an advertisement, that the Hon. Edward Everett, in
the Ledger of the past, week, has devoted his fine mind to the
production of a "Description of the Ledger Establishment," and
an "account of 'the* way it was built up." We are further informed that "the subject is treated in Mr. Everett's elevated,
graphic and picturesque style, and he gives much information concerning the Ledger which will be new to the public." Henceforward Mr. Richard B. Yeadon can attach a. new title to his oratorical
deity, and, in his future speeches, the ex-senator and ex-minister will
be "Orator, Patriot, Sage, Cicero of America, Laudator of Washington, Apostle of Charity, High Priest of the Union, Friend of
Mankind," and Historian of the Ledger !
We are not readers of the Bonnerian sheet, but we can easily
imagine how charming the details of the progress of the Ledgei*
must seem when worked up in Mr. Everett's " picturesque and graphic '' style.    It is doubtless treated somewhat after this fashion :
" Not far from where the pleasant slopes of Fulton-street gently
decline towards the margin of jhe noble river whose waves wash
the shores of South-street, whipthe odorous perfume of Baleanic
oils mingle in olfactory harmonTO with the aromas of the impervious
tar, and the tenacious oakum ; where the eye reposes with pleasure
on the charming gradations of color that- glow aloug the aisles of
the market j)lace, sliding from the rosy hue of the laborously polished spitzbergen to the phosphorescent splendor of the decomposing haddock ; where the gentle reverberation of the omnibus, and
the plaintive cry of the hackman greet the ear of the wayfarer with
a mild and soothing melody—*in the immediate neighborhood of
this romantic spot, there lies a pleasant by-way, hallowed to history
for all time, called Ann-street. It is, a spot that reeks with interesting associations, and superior mud. On one side towers that imposing pile known as the Herald Buildings, in whose vault laborious steam giants work unceasingly for the moral and intellectual
reformation of mankind. Hard by, a fane of exquistte beauty lifts
its symetrical bell-tower high in air, and not unfrequently one may
behold the healthy and graceful typographer bearing the quadrilateral form from the adjacent foundry. It is in this interesting spot
that the temple of Modern Reaspn has been erected. It is here that
the Ledger has been established. It is from hence issue the myriad
hebdomadal sheets that carry wit and wisdom and elegant writing
forth to gladden and instruct the world. Here sits enthroned, in
bland majesty, the monarch of the weeklies. That broad and imposing staircase has been trodden by the feet of a Fern, an Everett
and a Cobb. It is here that Washington's bones have been enfranchised from pecuniary slavery; it is here that the noble Bennett
bared his heart to the universe, and sang pathetically the moving
story of his Mary-Ann. This is the centre of Thought—the home
of Fiction—the palladium of the integrity of Mind. It is, in a Word,
the abode of Bonner!"
If this style of composition should compare favorably with the
description of the Ledger Establishment in the columns of that
paper we beg to offer our services to Mr. Bonner, and propose as a
subject, the histories of Lantern and Lady Woodruff.
STOP   WATCH.
Clack, clack, clack, clack, clack, clack! Doll, doll, doll,
doll, doll, doll! This is what any one may hear at any moment,
at almost any hour, cleaving the tide of mingled noises on Broadway. Every citizen knows what it means. That a gang of rogues
are in league to sell at auction mock watches for real ones. George,
who lives in Houston-street, is not to be taken in ; but Reuben,
who lives in Maine, and is on a visit, is easily trapped. The daily
papers are continually registering the melancholy experiences of
multitudinous Reubens. Yet the clack, and the doll are" as lively
as ever. If the police were claque and dolls mixed into one, the
mock-auction thieves could not enjoy a greater immunity. Can't
Mayor Wood find a key to wind up their watches ? or is it to be
always an escape movement ?
The Speakership.
A Ship in Distress.
How shall the Union be Preserved.
Tammany Politician's Answer.—With Brandy.
Doughface       " "      .—With Whine;
"Oh! Willie, we have missed you!"